Informed Consent
by jncar
Summary: How Uhura reacts when Spock tells her about Pon Farr. An angst-free, commonsense approach to a taboo subject.


**Author's notes: **This is just a little one-shot where I work out my ideas on what _pon farr_ must really be like. Not directly related to my other Spock/Uhura stories.

**Informed Consent**

Nyota stared at Spock, her mouth hanging slightly open as her head reeled with the implications of what he had just told her. Of the long list of things that she could have and should have said, the first thing that sprang out of her lips was: "Why the hell did you wait until one week before our wedding to tell me this?"

Indignation welled in her chest as she stared at his impassive face. Now was not the time for his cold logic.

Spock's lips parted slightly, in the way they often did when he knew she would not like what he was about to say. "The subject is strictly taboo among my people. We do not even discuss it among ourselves, let along with outsiders. I required the permission of T'Pau, my clan matriarch, before I could proceed with our discussion. I did not receive that permission until this morning."

Nyota's frown deepened. She folded her arms across her chest, and the two feet between their respective chairs suddenly felt like a vast chasm. "And if her permission had never come? What would you have done?"

"I determined that three days prior to our wedding would give you appropriate time to reconsider our union."

She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to control her anger. She loved Spock, but sometimes his very alien sense of ethics could be infuriating. Now was not the time to react in anger. She needed to discuss this rationally. And most of all, she needed information.

After a long silence she finally found a place to start. "So...you've never actually experienced _pon farr_?"

"No."

"And your people don't talk about it? So how do you even know what's going to happen?"

Spock's eyes looked slightly apologetic as he replied. "All Vulcan youth are informed of Pon Farr as part of an age-grade ritual when they turn fourteen. I was told of _pon farr_ by my father and one of the clan elders. No one has spoken of it to me since that time."

Nyota bit back the urge to violently curse Vulcan Puritanism, and took a deep breath. "Did they give you specific details and information, or just generalities?"

The look of apology in his eyes intensified. "They spoke primarily in generalities."

Nyota rose to her feet. "God damn it, Spock! So you don't really know what's going to happen at all. All you know," she said, paraphrasing the words he used a few minutes earlier, "is that sometime in the next three or four years you'll go into some sort of mating frenzy that will strip you of your logic and lead to a dangerous buildup of hormones in your blood stream that will kill you unless you achieve sufficient physical and mental union with your bondmate. Right?"

He nodded lightly in return. "It was also implied that the process is both physically and mentally violent, and is a stressful and unpleasant experience for both partners."

She clenched her teeth again and turned away from him, spinning this new information in her head. "Physically violent?"

"I have never seen evidence of any lasting physical damage to Vulcan women occurring during _pon farr_. However, as you know, Vulcan women possess three times the physical strength and endurance of human women."

This was what Nyota had been dreading. "So, the real possibility exists that while you're in this Pon Farr frenzy, you might cause me lasting physical damage?" The last three words hang ominously in the air between them.

"I would never purposefully harm you--"

"But during _pon farr_ you might hurt me accidentally," she finishes.

"Yes, my Nyota. This is why you must carefully consider whether or not you still wish to proceed with our bonding."

Nyota took a few more deep breaths, and returned to her seat. "I love you, Spock."

"I know."

"I want to marry you, and only you."

Spock's eyes fell. "I understand. You cannot act on your desires given this new information."

Now Nyota really wanted to throw something. "Don't be an idiot. I'm not backing out--" Spock's shoulders straightened and his eyes snapped back up to hers. "This is a little scary, and a little confusing, but I still plan on marrying you Spock. I want this bond more than anything."

"As do I," he replied, leaning fractionally closer to her.

"Okay." She nodded. They sat in silence for several moments as she continued to turn the new information over in her mind. "What I think I need," she finally said, "is enough information to go into this thing with full consent, knowing exactly what I'm getting into. Just like with our telepathic bond."

Spock and Sarek had both explained the bond and all its implications to her at great length before they were even engaged. There was no reason why she should expect any less explanation regarding _pon farr_.

"I have no more information to give you. You now know as much about _pon farr_ as I do."

This time she actually did curse Vulcan Puritanism--out loud, with repeated profanity. In the midst of the cursing she also managed to articulate how utterly illogical it was for an entire society to leave an important and unavoidable biological process shrouded in such secrecy that young Vulcans didn't even know what to expect of their own bodies.

When she calmed down, Spock interjected. "You voice valid criticisms. The taboo surrounding _pon farr_ defies logic, just as the process of _pon farr_ itself defies logic. However, this does not alter the fact that I have no more information to share with you."

Nyota scowled and began to pace. "So we need to talk to someone who _does_ have more information.

"We could contact T'Pau--"

"The bitch who wouldn't even let you tell me about it until a week before our wedding?" She glared down at him. "I don't think so."

His lips grew tight. He was clearly growing impatient with her profanity-laced emotional outburst, but right then she didn't care. The future of her marriage was at stake.

As she stared down at him, a sudden, wonderful insight popped into her mind. "Wait a minute--your mother got through it just fine. So it can't be all that bad, can it?"

Spock looked slightly taken aback. Clearly--like most humans--he'd never spent time thinking about his parents' sex life. "You are correct. My mother must have endured at least three cycles of _pon farr_ during her marriage to my father, if not four. Clearly, it is in fact something that can be borne by human women."

"Yes, clearly it is." Nyota smiled for the first time since their conversation began, as her fears began to subside. She had met Amanda Grayson several times before her death, and Amanda was certainly not the type of woman who would put up with an intense bout of physical, sexually, and mental abuse every seven years for the sake of keeping her man. Nyota was beginning to suspect that the same Puritanical tendencies that had turned _pon farr_ into a taboo subject had also exaggerated its negative implications.

"And," she continued, "now I know just who we can turn to for information--the one man in the galaxy who has personal knowledge of just what it's like for a human woman to deal with her Vulcan mate during _pon farr_--your father."

To people didn't know him well, Spock might look only slightly perturbed, but Nyota knew from the expression on his face that he was positively horrified at the prospect of discussing _pon farr_ with his father. "It would be very inappropriate to question my father about his experiences with my mother during _the time_."

"And it would be very inappropriate to deny me the one source of information who can let me know what I'm really getting into when I marry you. I'm calling him with or without you. Is that clear?"

There was nothing Spock to do to dissuade her, and in the end he sat by her side as she initiated the communication with Sarek.

Just as she expected, Sarek's eyes went wide when she posed her first query. "This is not an appropriate topic of discussion--" he began.

She narrowed her eyes and interrupted. "I can't marry your son--I can't bond with him--until I know what to expect. And you're the only one who can help us. So unless you want him to die in the fires of _plak tow_, I suggest you answer my questions."

Her words seemed to mollify him somewhat.

"This is not an easy subject for me to address," he stated.

"I understand. We just need a few simple answers, and then we never need to talk about it again. Can you do that for us?"

She held her breath as he stared silently back at them from the comm-screen. "Very well," he said at last. "I will answer your questions."

Nyota nodded. She decided to get the big question out of the way, first. "Based on your experiences with Amanda, do Spock and I have any reason to fear that he'll kill or maim me?"

"No, most certainly not," was Sarek's emphatic reply. "During our first _time_ she did receive several minor injuries, but we were able to take precautions during our other _times_ to prevent such occurrences from happening again."

Spock spoke up. "Will you please explain, in detail, those precautions? I have no desire to harm Nyota, and if measures can be taken to prevent such harm, I wish to make use of them."

Sarek seemed unfazed as he explained the use of mild sedatives on the Vulcan partner and the necessity of providing close access to water, easily consumed high-calorie foods, stimulants and basic medical supplies for the human partner to use periodically during the several days of _pon farr_. As he spoke, Nyota felt a great sense of relief washing over her. It seemed that _pon farr_ meant little more than a few days of rough sex with few breaks. It would undoubtedly get uncomfortable after the first few hours, but all of Sarek's suggestions made perfect sense as ways to make the process as easy as possible.

"Thank you," she said once he finished explaining the recommended precautions. "That was extremely helpful."

"You are welcome. Is this conversation complete?" He sounded eager to be done with it.

"Not yet, father."

Nyota looked at Spock in surprise. She hadn't expected him to be an active participant in the conversation at all.

"Yes, my son?"

Spock looked intently at his father's face. "You have spoken only of the physical implications of _pon farr_, yet, in my youth, you led me to believe that the mental and emotional experiences is just as violent and disturbing as the physical acts, if not more so. Just as I desire to avoid harming Nyota physically, I also desire to avoid harming her mind. Are there any precautions that I can take to avoid harming her through our bond?"

Sarek looked at them both sternly. "During the time of _pon farr_, your minds will be joined more completely and utterly than at any other time in your lives. But it is not a joyful union. Your minds will be overcome with base, animal desires. Your hidden secrets and darkest desires and impulses will be laid bare. There will be no rationality, and little control. It is a highly unpleasant experience for which you can do nothing to prepare."

Nyota's lips drew tight as she sucked in a long breath through her nose. "But--will the experience do any lasting harm to our minds, or to how we think of and feel for each other?"

Sarek's eyes softened ever so slightly. "No. It will not."

Spock nodded. "Thank you, father. I am grateful for your assistance. I believe all of our questions are answered. He turned to look at Nyota with a question in his eyes.

She nodded. "They are. Thank you. I look forward to seeing you at our wedding next week."

"As do I." He nodded, and then cut off the communication.

Nyota took another deep breath, and then turned to look at Spock.

"Okay." She took his hand and did her best to transmit her feelings of reassurance and confidence to him. In reply, she could feel his happiness and contentment.

"We can do this," she said. "If we follow all of your father's advice, and go into _pon farr_ prepared, I'm sure it won't be that bad."

Fortunately, for both of them, she was right.


End file.
